Trial Run #1

My little boy starts school (for some reason, "daycare" sounds better when you call it "school") next week when I have to go back to work. The director had suggested coming in for a "trial run" before his actual first day in order to make sure that he has all of his supplies, paperwork, etc. completed. So, this morning we got up at 6:15 and managed to get fed, dressed, and out the door by 7:05--not an easy feat with an infant.

We arrived at school around 7:25 where the director introduced us to Ash's teacher (Sandra) and helped us to pick out his crib and load up his drawers with supplies. She checked to make sure that I had filled out the stack of paperwork correctly while I wrote out a check for an astronomical amount (you don't want to know) and Ash stared wide-eyed at the other two babies in the room. Then she said the most horrible words I have been dreading for three whole months: "Do you want to leave him for a little while?"

About this time my eyes started welling up and the panic set in. I feel silly for being so reluctant to leave him. After all, I've known this day was coming since last May when we reserved his place. It's just that for the past three months I have never been away from him for more than a few hours at a time, and then at least I had the reassurance of knowing that he was with his daddy or nana. Now I'm going be leaving him with relative strangers for the better part of an entire day. Don't get me wrong; I love the daycare that we picked out and I am very confident that he will be well taken care of. It's just that he's MY baby and I don't want to leave him!

Anyway, I'm guessing the director is used to overprotective moms by now, because she just laughed at my panic-stricken face and said that we could try again tomorrow, and I should plan on leaving him for at least an hour--for my sake. Soooo...tomorrow we will be trying for trial run #2. The plan is to drop Ash off and then Kyle and I will go to breakfast while I try not to cry into my tacos. Wish us luck.